Monday, April 23, 2012

where it all began


my obsession with greece, that is.

that's me, with the white hat, standing with my dad -  and my sisters, who have always been more fashionable and cool than i. we're standing in syntagma square in athens on my first trip to greece, on our way to cyprus where my dad had business. all i remember is being blinded by the light of the place, mesmerized by the color of the sea, the sound of the language. i fell in love with - and was also unsettled by - this ancient landscape that spoke to me. 


i was planning this post some months ago....however, with my father's recent passing, i look at it today through different eyes. now both he, and the taker of the photograph - my mother - are gone. i have heard that you feel like an orphan once both your parents die. i don't know how i feel yet - it's too soon. for now, i look at this scene fondly and remember how my love of travel, exploring the world - and most undeniably my passion for greece started here.


one more thing that does not escape me as i look at this foto, is that my face seems blurred out, almost unrecognizable. 

not surprising, and it makes sense... 


...for in a way, greece helped to form me.

31 comments:

  1. This is such a lovely picture Amanda, and I see you as the stylish sister since you are the only one with with a hat. And your dad, what a debonair looking guy.

    Both my parents passed away a few years back and I have never felt like an orphan. I knew my parents and to this day, I see my mother all the time in myself. I see my father often in my brother. They never really go away.

    My family traveled a lot when I was a child also and I can see how I was formed by different cultures and fortunately, not my native Oklahoma.

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    1. haha - love what you say about the hat. that's me, miss stylish hat. i've always loved them, worn them..

      i appreciate what you say about not feeling like an orphan. i will start to think about it in this way, to see my mom in me, to see my dad in my brother. and perhaps me as well.

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  2. What a wonderful photo - so full of memories for you. I don't know if I ever told you how glad I am to have found your blog. I always look forward to all the things you share with us. It's interesting to see how young you were when you fell in love with Greece. Some feelings just get stronger with time don't they?

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    1. such loving words. thank you for sharing this, loree - it makes my day♡♡

      we are lucky in life when some wonderful feelings actually get stronger with time.

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  3. And that's how we keep them alive, through the stories we tell, the phrases they expressed themselves, the mannerisms we have inherited, the features we recognize in our selves, our children. There are so many things we still want to share, to talk about, and we'll find ways to express those thoughts somehow as our tribute to those we loved, and to the love they had for us.

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    1. so true, rosaria. i know you know this with your brian and the wonderful stories you tell which keep his memory alive. over time i hope to do this for both my dad and my mom.

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  4. Next June, at 81, for the first time in my life, I will set foot in my father's country. With my Greek name and not speaking Greek, I fear a little the first contact. But I'm sure it will be an highly emotional event.

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    1. how wonderful for you, paul. i wish you a kalo taxidi and many wonderful things happening on this journey. i just know it will be incredible - no need to fear.

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  5. What a fantastic picture. The memories, those glasses and that pipe. Wonderful that you have this moment to look back upon and realize what significance it held.

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    1. thank you, michelle.

      and yes, my glasses. back when cat's eye frames were in vogue for the first time!

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  6. wonderful picture! Lucky you to had such parents!

    Life and travelling
    Cooking

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    1. i do feel lucky to have had the parents i had, ola. they were the ones who taught me all about traveling this world of ours, and i am forever grateful to them.

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  7. what a gorgeous picture. I love your stylish hat, and your sisters blue sunglasses and your Dad looks like a big gentle protector of your all. I visit my parents in the mirror whenever i need to, I seem to have managed to be an exact mix of the two. I never stop missing them though but it does get easier and i feel them around me sometimes. I hope you are coping alright and always remember the special times xx

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    1. thank you, dear val. your words will comfort me in the coming days. and i will remember to visit them the next time i look in the mirror.

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  8. I'm a new reader, here, Amanda (by way of Sherry--your comment at her place caught my eye). So glad I stopped by, and am sorry to read of your loss (in the prior post). Sometimes it takes a long while to figure out how we feel, but it shall come. Those last couple of sentences. Wow.

    Peace.

    Jayne

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    1. thanks for visiting my blog and for your kind words, jayne. what you said about feelings - i have learned to give myself space and time to figure out how i feel. even so, i guess we never stop being surprised by this process.

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  9. I wonder if you realize,this is much more than a "post"...thanks..

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  10. We all have some idea of where our awakening began....you were very fortunate to be exposed to the outside world so early. Greece woke me up too with it's warm winds and bright white sunlight. I changed in it's glow. Losing both parents is something that I have not experienced. My Mom is still with us but failing very quickly. My Dad gone for 18 years now. They are in our souls and minds forever....and of everybody in our world...they cared for us the most. ....Hard to lose that ....hugs, Susan

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    1. you and i both 'awakened' in the light of greece. what a lovely thing to share, sue.

      i am sorry to hear about your dear mother.... blessings to you both as you embark on this powerful life transition together.

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  11. I've been a "orphan" for a while, but I never really felt orphaned.

    Love the picture — three very different young ladies, and a sharp-looking gent.

    By time I finished university, I had been in nine of Canada's ten provinces. That was a formative experience — seeing how differently people in the various provinces and regions view the world, and each other.

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    1. i'm so happy to hear that you don't feel like an orphan, Rob - i will take courage from this statement. perhaps i won't feel that way either, after enough time has passed.

      i believe that travel is one of the best educations in the world. one day i hope to travel to more of Canada's provinces. so far, i've only been to one.

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  12. What a fantastic photo to have Amanda. It's amazing that you're the only one in the photo with a fuzzy face! I guess you did go to Greece to get formed xo

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    1. i never noticed the fuzziness in my face until now. i think greece had plans for me even back then ;-)

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  13. Beautiful photo - and a telling one, too. I love that your Father smoked a pipe....mine did too! Sometimes, I can still conjure up the aroma ....

    I do believe you were waiting to *come home* to Greece as a young girl...your blurred face reveals that the *rest of YOU* was there, waiting to come together as one.

    You have been in my thoughts all week...thinking of all the arrangements to be made, the emotions to be shared....I wish I could do more.....but I am with you in spirit as much as possible.

    Sending you love and strength,

    ♥ Robin ♥

    p.s. While on a sunny walk in the park yesterday, I met an Airedale (or as I now refer to that breed - a *Mia-Dog*) and her *owner*....seeing her made me smile....I'm glad Mia is there with you.....she can feel your sadness.

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    1. ohhhh - so sweet dear robin!!! that cheers me to no end that you now call airedales 'mia dogs'!! you are right - mia does sense when i am sad. it's like she is psychic or something - but then i imagine most people's beloved pets act the same way...

      thank you for your loving thoughts - i feel them coming through as if you were here. thank you, dear twin, for these words. i think i was waiting for the rest of me to come together in greece.....but it takes time to realize these things in life.

      sending love and hugs,

      amanda

      xoxo

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  14. how wonderful a picture. seems as if the square did not change much. please have a good friday ahead.


    daily athens photo

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  15. Dear Amanda, what a picture, you are all so elegant and your family so beautiful . We learn so many things from our parents and family and these things stay in our hearts forever, especially the good things.
    My Mom has only one photo of her and her parents in Japan ( because everything was destroyed during the war) . We look at that picture on her piano and she always says she loves that picture.She is 6 years old on it, so adorable!
    Sending you peace and blessings .
    from your Brazilian friend

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  16. I've just found your blog via Suze http://analogbreakfast.blogspot.co.uk/

    Happy to be here and following along now.

    Another Amanda
    http://dramadiceanddamsons.blogspot.co.uk/

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  17. Amanda, this post made me cry. I imagined that you might be opening up like this but I am a little shocked at the profound rocking I felt in my spirit as I read your words. It feels like the beginning of an unassuming but luminous memoir. Beautiful language. Like something is struggling to be born.

    I love the photographs you've been posting, as well.

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  18. this post comes with candles waiting for me to light one, prayers waiting for me to listen.

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