Thursday, January 6, 2011

thresholds



being a new year, i've been thinking a lot about thresholds -- limens, barriers, crossings........those places in between that we must cross over before we move into a new place, a new experience, a new life. thresholds and ambivalence go hand in hand.

these kind of transitions also include endings.

with the holidays over, the house is empty these days. for many weeks between thanksgiving and christmas it was full of kids, guests, people to feed, to entertain......lots of noise, lots of fun.

now my daughter is back to her job - but not before a warm goodbye to our airedale, mia.

and son has flown the coop back to college. i watched his taillights disappear around the corner as he drove away.

and so did mia

before he left, the floor in his room slowly became visible once again after he began packing to return to school after 6 weeks' break

and the front hall became a loading zone

goodbyes are tough, but necessary. kids need to fly off to their own lives. it is our job as parents to encourage them to do that.

as hard as it may be for them........and us.

thresholds, ambivalence. 

with moments in life that bring mixed emotions, instead of seeing just the negative, my husband and i like to say, "it's rich."


and it is. all of it. 


bless you all and may you welcome this new year with open arms. i know i certainly am. 


xo♡a

26 comments:

  1. I love this post, you are such a poet and an inspiration as a parent. Honestly, you made reflect and take strength in your words. Happy New Year dear one.

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  2. There is some peace in the quiet aftermath of a wild, active holiday, but I just do not want it too quiet for too long. You said it perfectly... ambivalence

    Your feelings and emotions are beautifully expressed in your prose and photos... Merci, mon amie!

    Bisous,
    Genie

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  3. bless you too. I'm also embracing this year with the widest open arms

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  4. Hear, hear to the thoughts in this lovely blogpost!

    May 2011 be a great one for you.

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  5. ah the sadness of parting, but the joy of successfully fledged young; a bitter sweet and beautiful post xx

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  6. Oh that last photo brought tears to my eyes. Happy New Year, dear friend!

    PS The word verification for this comment is "fully". I think that describes you--fully embracing life. xoxo

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  7. Beautiful analogy! So bittersweet, but so necessary! Growing independent is the first step of adulthood. I love how you took us through the goodbyes.

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  8. Letting kids life is necessary but soo bitter sweet. I can imagine how hard it must be but we must all go through it.

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  9. What a powerful introduction Amanda about thresholds -- limens, barriers, crossings........those places in between that we must cross over and over again a whole life... I wish you all by heart a Happy New Year filled with beautiful crossings without many barriers!!

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  10. My youngest son is packing up to return to school today, as well. His floor isn't quite visible yet.

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  11. What a wonderful post. I don't look forward to the day that I have to let my little one go forth into the world, but at the same time I remember the joy and excitement and sense of promise of those first days of freedom, and I want her to experience that. It is a part of our job as parents, to let go. And you're right, it is all so very rich.

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  12. My nephews are going off to college next year and oh boy...I don't look forward to that goodbye. but it's just something that we have to do right? give them their wings....

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  13. The old order changeth
    Yielding place to new.

    ~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson

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  14. Brought tears to my eyes. I too watch the tail lights until the wee end far beyond on the gravel road and out of sight. I send light for a safe journey and strength for the next parting.

    Then I get busy with all my work and things that didn't get done because I put myself last. This is a very good year I can already feel it, for crossing those thresholds and starting anew.

    Go forth little one to big things....xoxo

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  15. I can so relate to this post. All 3 of my sons were home. My oldest, 23, what a mess. I had forgotten that. I felt sad and yet happy when I knew he was off to Michigan to continue his research. Happy 2011. All the best with your memoir.

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  16. Brava! Well said. I had all four of my children and their spouses and families under my roof for 10 glorious days this holiday. What a rare treat!

    You capture perfectly the acceptance and ambivalence in seeing them leave.

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  17. Thank you for sharing this one Amanda!!Even though me tears were falling as I watched the hugs and car leave...but I also felt my heart get bigger and I understand what you mean about enjoying all of the emotions.Blessings,Cat

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  18. Thank you for sharing you beautiful family. Lovely post.

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  19. Oh dear. This is the richest post i've ever read. you are so blessed my dear friend.

    hugs + love,
    lori

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  20. yoli -- many thanks for these kind words. i believe you are a ways from this stage with your little ones. best of wishes to you my friend for a rich and rewarding new year♡

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    genie - not wanting it to be too quiet for too long --- therein lies the rub, right?!! for now, tho, i am enjoying these slower paced days that winter tends to reinforce ;-)
    xx

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    janet - from reading about your travels all over africa, there's no doubt that you meet life head on - here's to embracing 2011 the same way!

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  21. same to you dear dd!!

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    val - bittersweet, yes. those times we like to call 'rich' ;-)

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    japra -- fully -- i like that♡ thanks dear friend xx

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  22. rosaria - you couldn't have said it better: Growing independent is the first step of adulthood.

    also one of the hardest, too. that's what makes it so rewarding, i guess, having taken those first steps....

    xx
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    loree - yes, there's no way around it. although sometimes we just like to stay in bed and pull the covers over our heads! ;-)

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    philip - love that: "wishing you a Happy New Year filled with beautiful crossings without many barriers"

    the same to you my friend ;-)

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  23. tess - let me know what you find when the clutter clears ;-)

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    wanderer -- i like thinking of it that way - remembering how great it was when we first experienced that freedom. i will try to remember that the next time instead of just worrying!

    btw thanks for dropping by!

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    mim -- give them their wings indeed. roots and wings, that's what i've always heard....

    may your nephews be off to a great start!!

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  24. miss sadie - not only are you a spectacular looking standard poodle, but you also quote lord tennyson! will wonders never cease?

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    sister - my first resolution i would suggest for you is to stop putting yourself last and move yourself up high on your list. maybe even consider first place??

    and you can see those taillights for a LONG way on your driveway ;-)

    xxx
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    sonia - having 3 boys home and then sending them off again to their own lives must leave such a void. but yes, knowing your son is following his heart in school is such a blessing. what is he studying?

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  25. jo -- 4 children and their spouses and families......for 10 days? you are remarkable!! but if everyone gets along, a circus like that can be fun ;-)

    btw thanks for dropping by!

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    thank you dear cat -- you have a few years before you have to face this stage at least!!

    xx

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    glynis -- thanks so much! hoping you are settling back home now that you are returned from your trip!

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  26. dearest lori,

    thank you for saying that. i do feel blessed -- even those moments tinged with sadness when my kids leave to return to their own lives, i am so blessed.

    as are you, my dear. sending many hugs and love ♡

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